


What if you go?

by Saenda



Category: Tales of Vesperia
Genre: Angst, Crying, Fever, Hurt/Comfort, I'm indulging myself, M/M, Poison, Sickfic, Whump, because I'm absolutely thirsty for sickfics, cutting it close, hard-headed idiots, hurt Flynn Scifo, it's a mighty need
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-06-03 04:52:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19456735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saenda/pseuds/Saenda
Summary: Yuri just wanted to spend a few days with his boyfriend. He'd even made the trip on boat and foot to get to Aurnion.But the idiot just had to go with a search party to rescue a caravan when he apparently had been feeling under the weather. And now he was missing, so Yuri had to go get him. Just great...He does find him, but...Yuri just wanted to spend a few days with his boyfriend. Spend some time together, maybe cuddle in bed. But not like this. Anything but like this.





	1. Rescue

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!
> 
> I haven't written for this fandom in ages! It feels good to be back :D 
> 
> I thought I'd bring Farewell over to AO3, take the time to edit it a little to make it better, but... God, for the ones who read it, my hat goes off to you, because I couldn't even manage to read most of it. Too much words. How did you do it? Lol Guess it'll stay forever on FFnet.
> 
> Anyways, here's my little indulgence. It's a little over the top at some point, but it's just the way I like it, so you'll have to endure, ha ha!
> 
> Enjoy reading!

Yuri watched the gates of Aurnion appear around the corner as he made his way towards the town and heaved a sigh of relief, Repede trotting next to him. It wasn't that he hadn't appreciated the trip, but considering he had to make his way here from Dahngrest in more traditional means, he couldn't deny being happy to have arrived after a few days of sailing at sea, of walking, and of fighting off monsters.

He would have made the trip with Judy and Ba'ul, but she'd already been gone a week before, on the trail of an item their guild had been requested for. Since it was a rather easy mission, Judy had volunteered to go alone.

Yuri's trip to Aurnion had already been planned before she departed, but he'd assured her he didn't mind the travelling and that he would enjoy some adventure. Besides, they'd agreed for her to meet up with him a few days after his arrival, so Yuri wouldn't have to go all the way back the same way he did. That was good enough.

The sun was already setting when Yuri set foot inside town and people were preparing for the night. Yuri was hungry, and he wished for nothing more than to settle down for the night as well, which was why he headed for Flynn's house.

The Commandant's house was a simple and small alcove. Despite his rank, Flynn hadn't gotten used to the privileges that were granted to him - nor did he seem to want to get accustomed to them either.

Yuri didn't knock; he'd stopped that ages ago and had been given the privilege not to anymore - if anyone asked, Yuri always said that Flynn had taken the fun out of it.

Leaving his belongings near the door, he didn't bother removing his boots. If Flynn was going to steal his amusement, Yuri would make sure to find other ways to annoy him.

"Flynn? Hey, I'm here!"

When he received no replies, Yuri frowned, looking around. The house wasn't big, and had barely more than three rooms, so either Flynn could not hear him because he was asleep, or he wasn't inside. Which was a little weird because they'd agreed to meet up here.

Yuri searched briefly, calling again once or twice more, before he had to admit that Flynn was indeed not home. Maybe something urgent came up and he had to go out.

With a tired sigh, Yuri exited the building, having no choice but to look around the place.

When he arrived near the watchtower, his annoyance only grew as he spotted familiar fiery red hair that he did everything in his power to avoid whenever he was in town. But since Flynn was nowhere to be seen, she would probably be his best lead.

"Hey, have you seen Flynn?" Yuri asked, cutting right to the chase.

Sodia turned at the sound of his voice and made a disgusted face at his presence. Yuri rolled his eyes. He wasn't enjoying this anymore than she was, but at least, he was politer about it.

"Did you have to start by looking in town instead of going straight to his home?" she answered with that 'holier-than-thou' attitude. "That's dumb, even for you."

Yuri chose to ignore the cutting remark. "I've actually just been there. He's not home. Where is he?"

Sodia's eyes widened at his answer and, for a second, Yuri saw incomprehension and worry in her eyes before they were replaced with her previous bitchy face. Without a word, she stormed away past him, ignoring his protests.

With a groan and a look to Repede who merely huffed, Yuri followed her, hating to admit the small worry in the pit of his stomach. The way she'd frozen before taking off couldn't be called good.

When he made it inside Flynn's home, he saw Sodia investigate the bedroom before she started cursing in colourful words that Yuri was a little surprised to hear from her. She then turned around and stomped back to the entrance but was stopped dead in her tracks when Yuri blocked her.

"Out of my way, Lowell," she growled.

"Look, something's obviously going on with Flynn. He's my friend, and I want to know what's wrong."

She debated for a moment whether to tell him or not, he could see it in her eyes. He didn't care. He would do about anything to make her talk, or he'd simply tag along wherever she went until he got answers if that was what it took.

Thankfully, it didn't come to that. "Earlier, a man arrived at the gates requesting help. Apparently, his caravan and travelling group were attacked by monsters. He managed to escape to get help, so we sent a few troops to go look for them, the Commandant among them. However, he hasn't been feeling so great in the past few days, so I kindly asked him to rest as soon as he came back, promising him I would have everything under control," Sodia said, her tone implying that _kindly asking_ must have been more along the lines of forcing him.

"As stubborn as ever, I see," Yuri retorted, both amused and annoyed at Flynn. It was funny how pig-headed Flynn could be, but if Sodia saw fit that Flynn should rest, then it meant that it was getting bad.

"I heard that the troops came back earlier, but I didn't personally check since I was busy at the time."

"And you think Flynn might not have been with them when they returned," Yuri finished, her reasoning dawning on him. Which made sense, because he hadn't spotted him in his usual spots in town.

Damn Flynn, couldn't he stay still for once in his life?

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go search for him," Sodia cut in, trying to go past Yuri once again, but he stopped her a second time.

"No, stay here in case he's still in town or if he comes back. I'll go with Repede. He can track him more easily anyway."

Sodia huffed, but didn't protest, so Yuri took that as her assent. They both made their way outside, Yuri already preparing himself for a few hours of searching, which he already hated.

Not because he was worried. He wasn't worried at all. It was just because he was hungry and tired, goddammit, and the sun was already setting, and it would make it hard to search for Flynn, and he _really wasn't worried for him, thank you very much_.

A commotion at the gate attracted their attention and, for a moment, Yuri hoped that Flynn was actually back, saving him of all the trouble. Instead, when he and Sodia made their way there, they were greeted with a group of knights, one of them holding a little girl against him. From the looks of it, there were no signs of Flynn.

Yuri ignored how his heart sunk after it did that little leap.

Sodia hurried to the knights, searching for Flynn as well. "Have you seen the Commandant?" she asked when she could find no trace of him.

The knights looked to each other in confusion. "When our troops found the caravan, they told us that one of their kids had been taken by the monsters. The Commandant dispatched a few of us to search for her, and thankfully we managed to find her not too far. We thought he came back with the rest of the caravan," one of them explained.

It was all the answer they needed. It meant that not only had Flynn gone on his own, but that no one really knew his whereabouts.

"Which way did he dispatched you?" Yuri asked.

"From what vague direction the mother gave us, we went looking South and East."

That left only West. It was a start. "All right, thanks."

Yuri set out without further ado, Repede already sniffing for a trail.

* * *

The sun had long set when Repede finally picked a trail he was confident with. Yuri followed him gladly, trusting that the dog was on the right track.

Sure enough, as they entered a forest, Yuri heard the faint sound of fighting further down the path. As it didn't bode well, he hurried along, uncertain of what he would find.

The sounds grew louder, and Yuri recognized Flynn's voice calling out various attacks among the noises of swords hitting against monster flesh. His voice sounded weaker and wobbly instead of the confidence it usually held. Flynn really wasn't feeling well, Sodia hadn't been kidding.

When they finally arrived, the sight sent Yuri's heart in his throat: Flynn was fighting, but he clearly wasn't winning. He was covered in bruises, blood dripping from an ugly wound near his left shoulder, his skin sweaty and ashen gray. There was a lack of force in his every limb, as though each move was painful for him, which they probably were. The monsters fighting kept coming, attracted by the idea of an easy prey.

"Shit," Yuri breathed. He didn't lose a second more and unsheathed his sword, running towards the nearest monster, cutting it down so it wouldn't get up.

He hacked his way towards Flynn, Repede not far behind, and ended up back to back with Flynn so he could protect him.

"You look like shit!" Yuri called out, impaling a wolf-like monster as he did so.

"G-good to see you too," Flynn panted and Yuri _heard_ the tremors in his voice, the trembling of his limbs, the shaking of his sword. Everything about Flynn screamed _weak_ and _exhausted_ and _sick_.

Yuri tsked, making sure to protect Flynn from every monster coming their way, knowing Repede was doing a good job on the other side. "You shouldn't be here, Flynn."

He waited for the heated retort, the denying, or maybe even the banter. Anything that was Flynn. Instead, he got,

"I know."

And that was when Yuri just _knew_ something was deeply wrong. For Flynn to admit his mistake so readily, to admit that he was in no position to be where he was now, meant that he had no energy left for keeping up the facade. Flynn had gone _beyond_ his exhaustion. It was a cry for help if Yuri ever heard one and he would be damned if he didn't answer it properly.

"It's okay, we'll get you out of here in no time. You just have to hold on a little longer."

Yuri swallowed down the fear when he merely got a nod, redoubling his own attacks to get rid of the monsters as soon as possible.

After a while, Yuri began to think that maybe things would look up after all. The monsters were beginning to clear and he could see an end to it. If things kept going this way, they might be finished with the fight in a matter of minutes, and they would be able to get Flynn back without much more bruising.

He should have known it was wishful thinking when he heard a cry resound behind him. When Yuri turned, he saw Flynn fall on his knees, sword weakly holding a wolf at bay. From the looks of it, Flynn wouldn't be able to hold on very long.

"Flynn!"

Yuri got rid of his own monster and whirled on his feet, cutting down the wolf in half before kneeling on the ground next to Flynn while still looking around to make sure no monsters came too near, knowing Repede would take over for the next moments. "Hey, Flynn! You all right? Talk to me!"

" _Yuri..._ "

His voice was so tiny, filled with pain and exhaustion. Yuri's throat tightened at the sound of it, hating how small and weak it sounded. The wound on his shoulder didn't look good either, as though it was already festering, and Yuri wondered if it was poisoned.

They had to get out of here fast.

He was confused for a second when Flynn looked up at him and saw him widen his eyes. He heard Repede's warning bark, but before he could even turn, he was pushed forcefully to the side.

He watched in horror as giant claws pierced Flynn's chest in a horrible squelch, blood splashing everywhere as they retracted. Yuri saw it all, frozen, his limbs rooted to the spot, a sense of nausea hitting him like a punch.

" _FLYNN!!!_ "

Yuri didn't know when his legs pushed him up, didn't realise how his arm grabbed his sword, fallen next to him when he'd been pushed, couldn't hear the roar from his mouth because of the loud ringing in his ears.

What he did know, was that the eggbear didn't live for long, its head severed from its body.

In a rage so strong, Yuri finished the rest of the monsters in a matter of minutes, only a few of them managing to escape in absolute fear of him.

When it was clear that they were alone, Yuri on the look out with his ragged breathing and crazed eyes, his sword fell from his hand and he whirled on his feet, rushing to Flynn who was convulsing on the ground, bloodied hands trying to press the wound but failing miserably. Yuri gathered him near, eyes frantically assessing the damage, but it was too much. The nausea hit him full force once again.

The wound wasn't pretty. But contrary to what Yuri had seen from his point of view, the claws had missed Flynn's heart and had instead pierced his chest nearer to his left arm. The blood loss, however, would be fatal if Yuri didn't do something about it soon.

"Flynn." He did his best for his voice to stay as strong and comforting as it needed to be. Flynn must be so scared, he didn't need to know that Yuri was as well.

" _Y-Yuri..._ " he gasped, face contorted in pain.

"Hey, hey, shhh!" Yuri soothed, clumsily rummaging through his pack for a lemon gel with one hand, the other occupied in helping to press the wound. "It's going to be fine, you'll see. You're strong, Flynn, you can do this easy! Just stay with me, all right?"

" _I-it hur...ts._ "

Flynn's eyes were dazed and unfocused. Yuri could see the hurt on his features laxing, and his own panic only spiked up. Yuri searched more frantically, cursing at himself and his inability to find a simple gel, his hand shaking in the bag as he pulled up the same useless gel again and again.

"Come on Flynn, don't do this to me," Yuri exclaimed, shaking him a little. "Repede, go get help!"

The dog was gone in a matter of seconds, already out of sight. Yuri just hoped he would be fast enough.

He let out a shaky cry of victory when he finally found the gel in question. He removed it from its package and crushed the gel in his hand before applying it on the wound directly. It didn't stop the bleeding entirely, but it helped lessen it.

Yuri would never regret the decision they'd taken for the world -- how they changed all the cores to spirits and transformed the aer into mana. But in that very moment, he cursed his inability to use his artes, because his Guardian field would have proven very useful.

He rummaged once more through his bags, this time for bandages. Thankfully, they were easier to find, even for his clumsy hand, and he proceeded to roll a makeshift bandage around Flynn's chest and shoulder, ignoring how the blood kept staining it.

When there was nothing more he could do until help arrived, Yuri gathered Flynn in his arms very gently and made him rest his head on his lap, brushing the blond locks with the hand that hadn't been too stained in blood.

He had to stop thinking that it was _Flynn's blood_ on his hands...

"Hey, come on, stay with me here!" he urged on. "Repede's gone for help and you'll soon be back in your bed to rest. Until then, you have to keep your eyes open."

It was hard, Yuri could see it. Flynn's eyes were fluttering close every chance they could get, and he was fighting so hard to keep them open. The fact that he'd looked sick before was probably not helping his case.

"They found the girl, by the way," Yuri said, knowing it would occupy Flynn's mind considering how invested in the matter he'd been. "Everyone made it back safely. So you do the same, all right?"

After a while, it became evident that Flynn was failing the battle he held against unconsciousness, despite everything Yuri was trying to make him stay conscious.

"Damn, come on Repede, you've got to hurry it up," Yuri muttered worriedly, looking up through the trees in hopes to spot a searching party or something.

Not long after, he was thankful when he heard the distinct hooves hitting the ground approaching towards them. Sure enough, he spotted fiery-red hair first among the trees. He never would’ve thought he’d say this, but he was so glad for the sight.

Sodia and Repede were the first to arrive, followed closely by a small group of knights trailing a cart and a doctor.

"Commandant!" Sodia gasped at the sight of Flynn as she hopped from her mount.

She didn't dare approach, however, since the doctor had already rushed to Flynn's side to take a look at him, the knights following with a stretcher.

"What happened?" the doctor asked, examining what he could of the wound and bruises.

"He was attacked by a group of monsters and he did his best to defend himself, but he was in no state to do so. An eggbear got him with its claws," Yuri explained as he helped the knights gently place Flynn on the stretcher.

The doctor cursed softly but didn't say anything more.

They brought him inside the cart and Yuri sat inside, a little further away in order not to be in the way of the medic's work, but still close enough that he could observe. Repede laid down next to him, panting from the long distance he'd ran twice.

By the time they made it back to Aurnion, it was way past the middle of the night.


	2. Worry

"Set him on the bed and then go fetch water and towels," the doctor barked as soon as they barged inside the hospital.

Yuri and the knight both holding the stretcher transporting Flynn laid him down on the bed as gently as they could. Then, Yuri fled immediately to go fetch the water, knowing that if he gave Flynn as much as another look, he'd only be reminded of his failure.

He mechanically gathered the items, his mind replaying over and over how Flynn had pushed him away, how blood had splattered everywhere, how he'd thought for a moment that it had pierced Flynn's _heart_!

He realised how his hands were shaking when he felt the water he'd collected start to spill on himself, and Yuri had to ground himself back to reality. He wouldn't break down, not when Flynn was the one who needed care.

When he came back, the sounds of wet coughing and wheezing filled Yuri's ears. He unfortunately finally caught a real glimpse of Flynn's state now that he was settled down, his clothes and armor removed.

Flynn's skin looked as white and ashen as snow except for the vivid fever flush of his cheeks and the dark hollowness of his sunken eyes deeply contrasting with the paleness of his skin.

"Hurry!" the doctor pressed on as he spotted Yuri.

Yuri hurriedly handed the water and towels, searching for something to do, to help, hoping to be given a task, any task, so that he wouldn't have to let his mind wander free. He was not so lucky.

"Thank you, you can leave now."

Yuri didn't protest. He quietly left, wincing inwardly at the quickening gasps of pain coming from the bed and ignoring with all his strength the weak call of his name.

He didn't go very far. He sat near the door outside, thankful when he saw Repede already waiting there, whining once he spotted his master coming out of the hospital.

"He's gonna be okay," Yuri whispered, wanting to reassure the dog.

It wasn't to reassure himself. He _knew_ Flynn would be okay. He didn't need any reassurances.

He buried his head in the dog's fur, taking a deep breath, bracing for the hours of waiting to come.

* * *

"Don't you ever look worried for someone?! You don't even look like you care about what happened to him!"

Yuri lifted his head up from where he'd been staring at the pajamas he'd gotten from Flynn's house, to make him more comfortable if he had to stay here longer than Yuri hoped. On the trip to Flynn's house, he'd washed his hands of Flynn's blood, feeling nauseated at the mere sight of it. He'd then grabbed something to eat, even if he'd lost all his appetite now. He hadn't eaten since yesterday and he wasn't sure when he would eat next, so might as well take care of it before he collapsed as well.

Since then, he'd sat against the exterior wall of the hospital, knowing he was still not welcomed inside.

He scoffed, irritated at the way Sodia loomed over him haughtily.

"Wouldn't you like to know." He rolled his eyes, trying not to give her the time of day. He wasn't in the mood for it.

She didn't seem to get the memo, however.

"Some friend you are! How could you let him get hurt like that?!"

She was making it hard not to chew her head off. He didn't need her to remind him how he had failed Flynn, he could do that himself thank you very much.

"Look, we were surrounded back there, and the monsters kept coming. He didn't exactly make it easy for us by choosing to go in the first place."

She rolled her eyes, the disgust on her face clear as day. "He takes hits for you and you can't even do the same when he needs it most."

Yuri's eyes darkened and the air chilled around them by his mere silence. How dare she?

He stood casually, but nothing in his demeanor screamed casual. Instead, he knew from her expression how cold and dark it must feel.

"Are you implying what I think you are?" he asked dangerously.

He took a step forward and she took a step back.

"Considering how _well_ you treat the people who care about Flynn, maybe I just didn't want to show _you_ specifically. Do you have a problem with that?"

She seemed to realise the impact of her words and had the tact to look shameful. She said no more, turning on her heels to flee.

Yuri watched her go with nothing but contempt before he turned his gaze to Repede lying next to him. He buried his hand in the dog's fur, attempting to reassure himself, feeling his body start to shake.

_You're so useless. You can't do anything right. How can he even think for a second that you could belong by his side? It's so ridiculous!_

Yuri exhaled a shaky breath when he felt Repede's snout sniffing and gently pushing against his thigh, grounding him. He needed to think of something else, otherwise he would spiral in dark thoughts and he couldn't afford that, not when Flynn was still in poor health.

The door next to him opened and the doctor half came out of the door, turning his eyes to Yuri. "I had a thought you might still be here. You can come inside now."

Yuri stood nonchalantly, entering after the doctor did. He followed him to Flynn's private room, perks of being the Commandant, and lingered around the doorway to take a better look at him.

Just by the sight of him, Yuri knew that Flynn wasn't out of the woods yet. He still looked like death was about to come claim his soul, and there were a lot of bandages around his chest and left arm. Everything screamed pain in Flynn's expression, his features twisted, and every movement seemed to cost him greatly.

His usual healthy and spiky golden strands were now dull looking and falling flat on his forehead, sticking to it because of the sweat from the fever. His lips were cracked and dry, almost as grey as the rest of his skin. His breathing was coming out in irregular gasps and wheezes, as it was obviously hard for him to breathe.

"Shouldn't he be better by now?" Yuri asked, approaching the bed where the doctor was checking the bandages.

Yuri's face was neutral, but he knew his tone was accusatory, and he couldn't care less.

The doctor didn't seem bothered by it.

"I did all I could," he answered, "but he's been poisoned when he was wounded, and I unfortunately don't have any more panacea bottles. I had to use the last of it on the group that arrived earlier. My shipment was supposed to arrive this week, but there was a delay somewhere, and they won't arrive until next week."

Yuri moved to the wall next to the headboard, leaning against it, eyes fixed on Flynn.

"What kind of poison is it? How long can he last?"

"A hallucinogenic one. And if we're lucky, around a week, give or take."

"If we're not lucky...?"

"I've seen cases progressing to the final stages in two days."

Yuri cursed internally. Given his streaks of rotten luck, he wouldn't be surprised if the poison spread too fast.

"What kind of progression does it have?"

"It starts slow, with dreams and nightmares, and the person wakes confused and disoriented. Then they start reliving memories even when awake. They're confused and unaware of the present, even if you talk about it to them. Then they relive the strongest fears they've ever felt. They see things we can't and it's practically impossible pulling them back fr--"

"Is that the final stage?"

"Sort of. It leads to convulsions, then a cathartic state, which is usually followed by death at that p– "

"Couldn't you have drained the poison? Isn't there anything else that can be used besides panacea bottles?"

"No. When he was hit, the poison got in his blood near his heart. It's a very potent poison, so when he kept fighting, it spread faster. This type of poison can only be cured by panacea bottles, and even then, they're not entirely a guarantee..."

Yuri tsked in frustration, sneer quite evident on his features.

"Maybe I could get the bottles myself. What are the chances I could get some back here on time?"

"My shipment is in Capua Nor, so no, I doubt you could get there and back on time. If you're feeling lucky and you've got a way to go back to Zaphias, the trip is faster, but it's two days from here, so four days until you return. If you're willing to gamble, you could always make the trip, and I would be grateful, but there's no way of telling if he'll make it that far."

Yuri tensed, but the doctor didn't seem to notice.

"And why can't you send someone?" Yuri growled, starting to lose his patience.

"I was going to ask the knights, but if you're so willing to go yourself, I won't bother them. It's still four days away, with chances of the panacea bottle not working completely. Our best bet would have been to use healing artes, but since the commandant deemed it best to transform aer, that won't really be possible now, will it?"

"You--!"

"Yuri..."

Yuri snapped his mouth shut and looked down, surprised to see Flynn looking at him through pained eyes, their blue as dull as the rest of the colours on his body. Judging from the pain he was in, he shouldn't be awake, and yet, there he was, watching Yuri with all the gentleness he could muster through the pain, as though to calm Yuri.

"It's okay..." he said softly.

Yuri bristled, features pulling into a snarl.

"Shut up, Flynn!" he snapped. "Take care of your goddamn self for once in your life and rest already!"

It only irritated him further how Flynn leveled his look, unfazed by his burst.

"It's okay, stop..." Flynn said again, trying to reach for Yuri.

Before he could, Yuri pushed himself from the wall with a frustrated grunt, avoiding Flynn's hand on the way. "I'll step out for a bit since I'm clearly a source of distraction. I'll come back when you're actually _sleeping_."

He stormed out of the hospital, needing some air and time to process what he'd learned so far.

There was no way he was letting Flynn die on his watch.

* * *

Yuri didn't stray far in his bout of anger. He paced around the hospital, Repede watching him with exasperation while he lay near the hospital door, unable to enter because dogs were obviously not allowed inside. Otherwise, Yuri knew Repede would be by Flynn's side by now.

Kicking rocks on the ground, Yuri's hands itched for some fighting, knowing it would be the best way to get off some steam. But he couldn't leave, not when Flynn was in this state, so instead, he racked his brain for any way he could acquire those panacea bottles faster.

Unfortunately, there was nothing much he could do without Judy and Ba'ul, and making panacea was out of the questions since he remembered the ingredients well and knew there was no way to acquire most of them on this continent. Yuri was in a bind and he knew it.

He just had to hope that Judy would return tomorrow instead of in two days.

When he'd calmed, he made his way back inside, hoping that Flynn had gone back to sleep at this point. The damn man was hopeless when it came to taking care of himself.

He spotted the doctor taking care of the injured from the group that had been rescued the night before, and he made his way to him.

"I might have a solution," Yuri said, "but I'll need a friend of mine to arrive here first. She should be in Aurnion in a day or two. When she is, there's someone we could go fetch who's still able to use healing artes. She'll be able to help better than panacea bottles."

The doctor nodded, pleased. "Good, let's hope you're right, because that would grant us more time. For now, we'll have to assume the worst-case scenario and make sure to keep him alive until the shipment arrives. The Commandant's state will be critical, and he will have to be checked over constantly, which is why he should stay here for the time being. I've given him some drugs to help with the pain."

"Is there anything I can do to help out?"

"Yes, there is indeed," the medic replied. "I've got my hands full with the patients from the caravan, so it would help me monitor him more constantly. I'll show you a few simple things to do."

Yuri nodded.

"You'll have to make sure his wounds don't fester too much. It will, because of the poison, but we can still prevent some of it with poultices. Also, you should check his fever quite often. The fact that he was already overexerted didn't help his condition at all," the doctor explained.

Yuri gritted his teeth, silently cursing at Flynn. If he'd taken care of himself from the very beginning, like a normal person would, they might not be in this mess.

"Damn it, Flynn," he whispered.

"Let me just finish here and I'll be right with you. You can go see him for now."

Yuri nodded with a sigh and turned around, heading for Flynn's room. Once inside, he was relieved to see his friends' eyes closed, meaning he was asleep, finally.

Silently, Yuri made his way to the nearest chair, pulling it next to the bed so that he would have easy access to Flynn.

Now that he was alone with Flynn and that the latter was asleep, Yuri let the facade go a little and reached for the blond strands that were stuck on Flynn's forehead, gently swiping them behind his ear.

"What have you gotten yourself into this time," Yuri muttered, exasperated.

As though he'd heard Yuri, Flynn cracked an eye open. "Yu...ri?" he wheezed, his voice barely audible.

And yet, it was enough to make him start coughing, the sound deep and painful. Yuri cursed. He'd been certain that Flynn had finally been resting, but no, he just had to be so stubborn.

"Goddammit, Flynn," Yuri whispered both frustratingly and fondly once Flynn finally stopped coughing. "You should be asleep! Stop being so pig headed already!"

"M'sorry..." Flynn mumbled. Obviously, the drugs given to him were starting to win and it was only through sheer will that he was staying awake.

Yuri sighed. "Oh, for the love of... I already told you, start thinking of your stubborn ass for once and stop with the guilt! Just go to sleep!"

Flynn was losing the fight, his eyes closing on their own, but it was still telling when he simply nodded and closed his eyes, his body going slack. He finally allowed the drugs to do their job. Yuri just hoped it would be enough to help him sleep peacefully.

The doctor arrived in that moment and explained a few things Yuri should do throughout the day – how to apply the poultices and change the bandages, among other things. He left with the warning that he should be called if anything happened with Flynn's condition. Yuri watched him leave, then sat back on his chair, readying himself. He knew it would be a long day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Playing a worried Yuri is definitely hard, because he wouldn't want to show it. I hope I did him justice. I asked a bit of advice from [Lady of Greenwood](https://lady--of--greenwood.tumblr.com/), though, and it was really helpful!
> 
> Thank you for the comments and the kudos, it's greatly appreciated! :D


	3. Nightmares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, I'd forgotten the charger for my computer at my parents, so I didn't get to write until I went back.

"Yuri..."

Yuri looked up from the cloth he was wrinkling, cold water dripping from his hands into the bowl. Flynn's fever had risen over the hours and he'd since tried to bring it down. He didn't know if it was really working, but he at least hoped that it helped ease Flynn a little.

Flynn who was currently tossing and mumbling in his sleep, eyebrows pulled into a frown, breath quickening. Judging from the way he looked, he was probably having a nightmare.

Yuri wondered if that was the first stage starting.

"L'me go. L'me go. Have t'go..." Flynn kept mumbling. "Yuri... Yuri..."

"Hey, shhh..." Yuri murmured with gentleness. He started cleaning Flynn's face, removing the sweat. "Come on, Flynn, it's just a nightmare. Wake up."

Flynn jerked at the contact. He tossed and turned in earnest.

"S'in the water! Yuri! Yuri!"

Shit. If Flynn kept tossing the way he did, he would soon reopen the stitches. Yuri gently but firmly grabbed Flynn’s arm. He hoped he would manage to wake Flynn up.

"Hey, Flynn, wake up. It's just a nightmare, I'm right here. Come on, wake up!"

"NOO!! Let me go, let me go!"

Yuri started. Flynn struggled harder, still deep in his nightmare. Whatever it was, he was panicked beyond reason. 

"Yuri's in the water, let me go! I've got to save him!"

A punch would be as effective. Yuri's grip almost slacked, but only the thought of Flynn reopening the stitches kept it tight. Otherwise, he'd be too shocked.

He straddled Flynn to keep him still, but it was hard to watch the tears falling freely as Flynn kept shouting the same things over and over.

He had to save Yuri. He was in the water. He'd fallen, and someone had to rescue him or he'd die.

Yuri had known that his fall at Zaude had affected Flynn. Of course it did! They were best friends. They loved each other too much. Estelle also told him Flynn had searched for him over and over, sending multiple fleets in hope of catching a glimpse of him.

But Yuri never thought it affected Flynn to the point where he would feel so devastated. So… _broken_. To think that Yuri had put his best friend through that kind of pain... 

Flynn was supposed to be strong. He _was_ strong. He was supposed to recover from this even if Yuri hadn't made it. Because Yuri was a mere common criminal. He shouldn't deserve such despair over his supposed death. That Flynn would be sad and devastated was to be expected. But to be _shattered_ about it?

No. No, Yuri hated the very thought.

The fact that the poison was making Flynn dream about that probably meant that there was a good part of Flynn that wasn't over it.

Yuri leaned down. He pressed his lips on Flynn's temple, then whispered in his ear. "Shh... Calm down. I'm right here, I'm safe. You can wake up and you'll see."

It finally seemed to work. Yuri felt the struggling dying down and the shouting coming to an end. He kissed Flynn's jaw this time.

"That's it. You're doing great. C'mon, all you have to do is wake up now."

Flynn's eyes fluttered open, recognition in them. Yuri breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hey there, sunshine, there you are!" Yuri attempted to tease, hoping to lighten the mood. "It was just a nightmare, we're both safe here."

It didn’t work. Something was wrong. Flynn was shaken, obviously, but when he saw Yuri, he wasn’t reassured. Instead, tears welled up in his eyes. He inhaled and released a wailing cry, fingers clawing at Yuri’s clothes.

Yuri was at a loss.

Thankfully, it didn’t last long.

"Shh, hey, shh... Calm down Flynn, it's okay," Yuri said softly, hands cupping Flynn's cheeks, wiping the tears awkwardly.

He did the motion a few times, unsure if it was helping. He was glad to see Flynn's sobs slowly dying down, replaced with hiccups.

"What's wrong? It was just a nightmare."

Flynn shook his head vehemently, a strong cough starting between the hiccupping. "You're alive, you're really alive," he murmured through gritted teeth.

"Yeah, of course I am. Could you really expect any less from me?"

There was a brief chuckle. Yuri counted it as a small victory.

"I was s-so scared," Flynn stammered. He closed his eyes, body shivering. Yuri suspected it wasn't only from the cold or the emotional breakdown. "I searched everywhere, b-but I always came up empty."

"I know. Estelle told me."

"I-I didn't want to believe. It hurt too much."

"You're strong, the strongest man I know. You would've gotten over it eventually."

Flynn shook his head. "Not for you. Never for you," he whispered, leaving Yuri breathless.

He was sure he would have been blushing if Flynn hadn't started coughing in earnest, his whole body shaking violently. He was coughing harder and longer, and couldn't find any space to breathe between them.

With worry, Yuri removed himself from Flynn and helped him lay on his side, so he wouldn't choke.

"Come on, Flynn, breathe! You've got to breathe!"

His hands hovered above Flynn uselessly, unsure of what else he could do to help, while his foot turned towards the door, ready to bolt to get the doctor if it got any worse. Judging from the red blooming on the bandages, Flynn had popped his stitches open.

"Shit..."

Then, just as abruptly as it had started, Flynn stopped coughing and his entire body slacked, except for the deep tremors seizing his body.

"Flynn?"

"Yuri... it-it hurts..."

If Flynn was admitting it so readily, then he must be in a hell of a lot of pain. It took only a second for Yuri to storm out of the room and haul the medic over.

If anyone asked, there was never any panic in his voice whatsoever, and he would be ready to fight anyone who would say otherwise.

The doctor finished quickly and came over. He noticed immediately that the bandages had turned red. He clucked his tongue in annoyance, setting to work.

"I'll have to redo the stitches. Maybe it would be best for you to leave."

Yuri's face hardened. The whimper he heard from Flynn was all the more reasons for him to protest.

"I'm not leaving him."

The doctor sighed, rolling his eyes, but thankfully didn't insist. Instead, he opened one of the drawers and gathered the items he would need for the stitches, as well as a vial that he handed to Yuri.

"Make yourself useful and give him this. It'll knock him out."

Yuri nodded and opened the vial. He placed a hand behind Flynn's neck and lifted it, placing the vial to his lips.

"Drink up."

Flynn, however, kept his lips tightly shut and shook his head, refusing to take the drug. Yuri frowned.

"Come on, Flynn. This'll only help," Yuri insisted, but was surprised when Flynn refused further.

"What's the hold up?" the doctor asked impatiently.

Yuri ignored him. Something was up. Flynn could be a stubborn patient, but not this way. "Flynn, what's wrong?"

"Don't want to watch you die again," he whispered in a devastated voice.

Yuri heard his heart shatter in pieces. That explained a lot. If Flynn went back to sleep, he was prone to getting nightmares again, because of the poison. Nightmares that were probably a thousand times worse than usual. Him being scared by them was understandable.

"It's okay," Yuri reassured softly, taking Flynn's hand in his. "I won't go anywhere. You can keep your hand right here if it helps too." He squeezed it a little. "And I'll wake you at any sign of nightmares. How does that sound?"

Flynn nodded. When his head was tipped again, he didn't resist this time. He drank the whole vial.

He was already exhausted, his eyes heavy even before he took the drug, so it didn't take much time before it came in effect. He fell into unconsciousness, Yuri never letting go of his hand as promised while he watched the medic working on the stitches.

* * *

The nightmares were awful. Flynn could barely get a wink of restful sleep before he was assaulted with terrible images of various things he'd feared before. What Yuri hated the most was that a majority of them were about him. Or, more accurately, what Flynn feared would happen to him.

His fall from Zaude came back a lot too.

Flynn's parents' deaths also popped up a few times, which were as unpleasant. To have to relive those moments over and over was just pure torture.

Yuri didn’t complain. Flynn had it worse.

Each time, Yuri woke Flynn as soon as he noticed him tossing, not wanting a repeat of earlier for his wound. Some were easier, Flynn waking up in a start. Others took more effort before he came to, shaking like a leaf.

Right now, it was one of those times, Flynn's body trembling as Yuri finished taking his temperature, wincing when he saw it had gone up again despite his best efforts to bring it down.

He suddenly felt one of his legs being grabbed. When he looked down, he saw Flynn holding on to him as though his life depended on it.

"Hey, want to talk about it?" Yuri asked gently, his hand reaching for the blond locks, caressing them.

Flynn shook his head but clung on the leg tighter. Yuri sighed softly.

"Scoot over."

Blue eyes looked up at him with questions into them. Yuri only signaled with his head for Flynn to give him space before he slid under the covers next to him. It took a moment for Flynn to understand before he latched unto Yuri, grateful for the contact.

"Thanks.”

"Don't sweat it," Yuri replied, kissing Flynn's forehead. "I know it's probably the last thing you want to do, but you really should try to sleep again. You need rest."

Flynn winced, but nodded. It wasn't like he had much choice in the matter.

“Sleep, I’m not going anywhere.”

With a kiss to his forehead, Flynn closed his eyes and smiled, content for the first time in a little while.


	4. Deteriorating

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm finally back! Sorry for the wait, school started and I had to prepare all of my classes. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy the new chapter :)

At some point, the nightmares finally stopped, and Flynn managed to get more rest. Yuri didn't let go. He was afraid he would jinx it otherwise, knowing his rotten luck.

Flynn woke up later in the afternoon, eyes a little unfocused. He sighed, a small content sound, making Yuri a little hopeful. Then he asked where they were, because this was definitely not the Lower Quarter’s inn, and maybe they should ask for Hanks wife to come because he wasn’t feeling so well.

Yuri’s hopes were crushed. Flynn had entered the poison’s second stage.

He learned quickly that trying to explain they weren't teenagers anymore was a very bad idea when Flynn started panicking. He wouldn't make that mistake again.

Flynn switched from memories of their childhood, to ones of their time in the knights, or even some recent ones about their quest to save the world. Thankfully, they weren't all bad, which was a nice break from the nightmares.

If the only thing Yuri had to do was act as if he were from that memory to make Flynn happy, he was totally in.

"Yuri!" Flynn whined. "What'd you get us into? We're supposed to be at practice."

He was staring at the ceiling. His whole expression seemed out of it, but Yuri found that he might actually get some fun out of this one. He chuckled, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, how is it my fault?" he protested. "I didn't do anything!"

Flynn tried to get up but didn't get further than lifting himself a few centimeters. He collapsed back on the mattress, panting.

"I... I know you... You obviously f-found trouble... and now I'm stuck here because of you."

Yuri raised an eyebrow mockingly, elbows on his knees, chin resting in his hands. "Well, thanks for the vote of confidence," he drawled.

Flynn glared at the ceiling.

"Wait 'til the captain finds out... We'll be in even more trouble because of you..."

"If you say so."

"I know so! Oooh..."

He'd tried to get up again, but was hit with a dizzy spell and collapsed back on the mattress.

"Hey, careful!" Yuri warned. He sat on the bed as a mean to prevent Flynn from getting up again.

"I... don't feel so good..."

"Yeah, no shit Commandant."

Flynn stared at him as though he'd grown two heads. He laughed. Hard. But it didn't last long, transforming into grimaces and coughing.

"C-Commandant? I," More coughing. "Wish!" he exclaimed, disbelieving.

Yuri smirked. "Then boy do I got some news for you!" he teased.

Flynn huffed. "S-stop making fun of m-me!"

"I'm not!" Yuri answered, both hands in the air as though he were innocent, but he knew the expression on his face must tell otherwise.

"Y-you are!" Flynn accused. His face changed suddenly, and he was paler than before, if possible.

"Flynn?" Yuri reached for Flynn's forehead. It was hard to tell if he was warmer than earlier or not.

"My chest burns..." Flynn hissed, his hands weakly clawing at the bandages.

Yuri stopped him immediately, placing both his hands on each of his sides.

"Don't do that! You'll only make it worse," he chided gently. "I should probably change your bandages."

"W-what trouble did you get us... into...?" Flynn asked grumpily.

His voice sounded weaker.

Yuri started undoing the bandages as he contemplated how he hadn't been able to help Flynn. It should have been him with the wound.

"Yeah... it was my fault all right.”

"I... knew it..."

It sounded like Flynn was falling asleep, but if Yuri was changing the bandages, it might be a good thing to check Flynn's fever.

He gently tapped his cheek to keep him awake a little longer.

"Hey, don't fall asleep just yet, I need to take your temperature."

Flynn opened bleary eyes but was otherwise unresponsive. Yuri grabbed the thermometer and slipped it under Flynn's tongue. While he waited, he undid the rest of the bandages and proceeded to apply more poultice on the wound. He noted sourly how red and greenish it had become and knew that the poison was spreading.

He rolled fresh bandages on Flynn's chest and left arm, then grabbed the thermometer from Flynn's mouth and checked the results.

"It's gone a little down. Here's to hoping that you're recovering a little and that the medicines are effective."

Flynn didn't hear any of it, however, already fast asleep. Yuri smiled.

"Hope you manage to sleep this time too," he murmured fondly.

* * *

Night had settled once again. Yuri had to light up the room with the lamp on the nightstand. Through the course of the afternoon, he'd managed to make Flynn drink some water and even gotten him to eat some soup. If anything, that was promising enough.

Since then, Flynn had gotten back to sleep. Yuri had watched over him like a hawk, a strand of his hair twirling between his fingers again and again. By now, it was probably twisted and full of knots.

The doctor had checked in about an hour ago, noted what Yuri had done throughout the day and what changes had happened to Flynn's condition, before he went back to his other patients. There was nothing much he could do in all of this waiting.

A whine caught Yuri's attention. Flynn was opening his eyes, face so white, Yuri wondered if he was getting translucid.

His breathing picked up in short gasps. He tried to turn on his side, but couldn’t. His whines got louder, eyes watering. When Yuri stood to check on him, he noticed that his face was not only white, it was turning green.

He finally understood what was happening, but before he could grab a trash can, Flynn was throwing up on himself.

"Shit!" Yuri made sure to turn Flynn on his side so that he wouldn't choke, but it was too late to find a trashcan to save the bed at this point.

Flynn threw up the little food and water he'd ingested until now. Even when it seemed to have all gone out, Flynn kept retching, the sounds of dry heaving obvious. His stomach was completely empty, but the nausea still attacked him mercilessly.

"Shit," Yuri cursed again, getting out of the room to get the doctor.

He arrived shortly. One look at Flynn was enough.

"Wait until it passes, then bring him to another bed and I'll check what's wrong."

Yuri nodded. He hovered over Flynn while he kept dry heaving, unsure as to what he could do or say to comfort. There were tears streaming down Flynn's face and he was trembling violently. His cheeks were flames, almost illuminating the room along with the dim light of the lamp.

Yuri suddenly remembered he'd brought a few pair of pajamas. It was as good a time as any to change them.

In the time he got another pair of pants and placed it next to the bed, Flynn was finally granted a reprieve, his breathing shaky and fast.

Yuri used the water on the nightstand to clean Flynn as much as he could before he gathered him in his arms and lifted him from the bed. He knew the moment they touched that his fever had drastically risen again.

He slowly walked outside the private room to one of the free beds.

"Y-Yuri _... it hurts..._ "

"Shh... I know. Hang in there," Yuri answered softly, hugging Flynn a little tighter before he placed him on the bed. He tenderly carded his fingers through Flynn's hair, pushing back a few locks plastered on his forehead. "It's gonna stop soon, just hang in there."

He washed Flynn more thoroughly now that he was in a clean bed, hoping to soothe him with the cold water. Then, as the doctor started undoing the bandages, Yuri pulled back and headed for Flynn's room, unable to stand still.

He heard the doctor cluck his tongue. "It's spreading faster than I'd hoped."

Yuri didn't know if he was meant to hear it, but he fled back faster. He started to clean the soiled sheets on the bed, not knowing if someone was supposed to take care of that or not. He didn't care. Everything to occupy his mind so that it wouldn't spiral in all that could go wrong; Flynn getting worse too fast, Judy not arriving on time, _Estelle_ not arriving on time or at all...

Yuri gritted his teeth. He quickly gathered the sheets once he'd removed most of the vomit. He took in a deep shaky breath that he released just as shakily.

Judy would be there in the morning or, at least, the afternoon. Flynn would make it, there was no doubt about it.

No. Doubts.

While Flynn was examined, Yuri proceeded to clean the sheets in the laundry room and made Flynn's private room cleaner than it was previously. He used to make fun of Flynn for finding cleaning relaxing. While he still didn't think it was, he could now understand the distraction it could provide.

By the time the doctor returned to see Yuri, the room wasn't spotless, but it was better for Flynn to return to.

"I've given him a strong sedative for now, because the pain was getting intolerable for him. You can bring him back in here, but then you should use the time to get some rest. You haven't slept in almost 48 hours, am I right?"

"I'm fine," Yuri said, walking past the doctor to go get Flynn.

"Isn't it what the Commandant said for a while until he made himself worse? Which led to this?" the medic asked, arching an eyebrow. "I shouldn’t have to tell you not to make the same mistake he did."

"I said I'm fine! I'm here because I'm still able to help around for Flynn. I'll go sleep when he's okay."

The doctor rolled his eyes. "Suits yourself. Just know that I don’t have the time to take care of you on top of it all.”

“I never asked you to.”

A sigh.

“You can always take one of the beds here. He won't wake up anytime soon with the sedatives I've given him. If you ever decide to get some sleep, I'll keep a closer look on him and, if anything happens, I'll wake you up."

Yuri averted his eyes nonchalantly and shrugged, then brought Flynn back to his room. He wouldn't be taking up space in a hospital when someone else might need it. No, if he had to sleep, he would do so next to Flynn's bed, on the ground.

He changed Flynn's pajama pants as well as his underwear, which were both soaked from all the sweating. Once Flynn was in fresh clothes, he tucked him under the cover.

The medic brought a few packs filled with ice. He placed them on each side of Flynn, above the cover, then placed the comforter above it all.

"His fever is too high and I can't really soak him in tepid water with that wound of his," he explained.

Yuri forced down the yawn that threatened to leave his lips, hating how his body was betraying him. He waited for the doctor to leave, and looked at Flynn, unsure of how to feel by the semblance of peacefulness in his expression, mixed with the hollowness of his skin.

He sat on the floor, taking Flynn's hand in his, caressing it with his thumb. He was well intent on watching over him for the rest of the night, but his eyes were getting heavier and heavier.

Against his will, he eventually fell asleep.


End file.
